the funnies
When You Start A Sentence With 'You Need To...'
Jun 18 2014 Filed in: The Funnies | JokeBlogger
Improv, Help Desks And Friend Bars
Jun 18 2010 Filed in: The Funnies | The Onion
'F**k You' - A Casual Study In Standing Up For Oneself
Jun 21 2010 Filed in: The Funnies | Streaming Web
Spontaneous Reunion In Song
Saratoga was way more than just a 20-year college reunion - it was a late-night Rick Astley-fest.
Tim & Willy • Reunited and it feels so good from Gary Gray on Vimeo.
The 'Giggle Machine' Rings The Death Knell For Soda Jerks
As reported on Asylum.com:
Rest in peace, oh soda jerk: Coke Freestyle elevates individuals to instant mixologists by using a zesty touch-screen system to mix selections from over 100 choices into a custom beverage, all while delivering a geeky high-tech thrill.
It's been called "the fountain of the future," "the most advanced soda fountain ever" and (in a backhanded-compliment kind of way) a path "leading to social ruin." Even Warren Buffett is a fan. But can this thing really deliver?
Coke spokesperson Helen Tarleton certainly thinks so, calling it a "complete departure from a traditional fountain machine." (She even reports that a gal was caught on security camera fondly embracing and kissing the machine.)
Tarleton expects 500 new Freestyle machines to pop up soon in Southern California, Atlanta, Dallas and Salt Lake City
We decided to take Coke Freestyle for a test drive at a local McDonald's in Atlanta, where we came up with some crazy combinations using the machine's 100-plus flavor options.
While Freestyle's club soda can help cut the sweetness of some of the machine's more intense flavors, you are likely to go crazier with the combinations than you think -- and you're virtually guaranteed to forget whatever it is you put in your cup.
But we were able to document a few of our greatest hits for posterity:
"Doogie Fanta, M.D." (Combination: Dr. Pepper, Vault Peach, Cherry Fanta)
"The Red Wolf Blitzer" (Vault Red Blitz, vanilla Diet Coke)
"Barqing Berry" (Barq root beer, raspberry Dasani Sensation)
"Looney Tunes" (Minute Maid strawberry, vanilla Coke, grape Fanta, club soda)
"Lima-berry" (Grape Fanta, Lime Dasani Sensations, Club Soda)
"Customers love them," says Stephen Cordell, McDonald's on Cheshire Bridge's first assistant manager, who seems like a proud father reporting that his two Freestyle machines connect via Wi-Fi to the Coke mothership every morning at 2 a.m. for software updates.
Freestyle feedback was largely positive. "Wow, this is cool" and "How neat" were thrown around McDonald's by customers while we were testing it out.
So go forth, soda geeks, but make sure to keep track of your mix for next time -- and keep some Tums handy for the inevitable sugar-stomachache.
And check out our video from our Coke Freestyle recon mission:
And take a look at our photo album, too.
Rest in peace, oh soda jerk: Coke Freestyle elevates individuals to instant mixologists by using a zesty touch-screen system to mix selections from over 100 choices into a custom beverage, all while delivering a geeky high-tech thrill.
It's been called "the fountain of the future," "the most advanced soda fountain ever" and (in a backhanded-compliment kind of way) a path "leading to social ruin." Even Warren Buffett is a fan. But can this thing really deliver?
Coke spokesperson Helen Tarleton certainly thinks so, calling it a "complete departure from a traditional fountain machine." (She even reports that a gal was caught on security camera fondly embracing and kissing the machine.)
Tarleton expects 500 new Freestyle machines to pop up soon in Southern California, Atlanta, Dallas and Salt Lake City
We decided to take Coke Freestyle for a test drive at a local McDonald's in Atlanta, where we came up with some crazy combinations using the machine's 100-plus flavor options.
While Freestyle's club soda can help cut the sweetness of some of the machine's more intense flavors, you are likely to go crazier with the combinations than you think -- and you're virtually guaranteed to forget whatever it is you put in your cup.
But we were able to document a few of our greatest hits for posterity:
"Doogie Fanta, M.D." (Combination: Dr. Pepper, Vault Peach, Cherry Fanta)
"The Red Wolf Blitzer" (Vault Red Blitz, vanilla Diet Coke)
"Barqing Berry" (Barq root beer, raspberry Dasani Sensation)
"Looney Tunes" (Minute Maid strawberry, vanilla Coke, grape Fanta, club soda)
"Lima-berry" (Grape Fanta, Lime Dasani Sensations, Club Soda)
"Customers love them," says Stephen Cordell, McDonald's on Cheshire Bridge's first assistant manager, who seems like a proud father reporting that his two Freestyle machines connect via Wi-Fi to the Coke mothership every morning at 2 a.m. for software updates.
Freestyle feedback was largely positive. "Wow, this is cool" and "How neat" were thrown around McDonald's by customers while we were testing it out.
So go forth, soda geeks, but make sure to keep track of your mix for next time -- and keep some Tums handy for the inevitable sugar-stomachache.
And check out our video from our Coke Freestyle recon mission:
And take a look at our photo album, too.
'The Lupus Of News." Pretty Accurate So Far
Apr 22 2010 Filed in: The Funnies | Cool People
| The Daily Show With Jon Stewart | Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c | |||
| 4/20/10 in :60 Seconds | ||||
| ||||
The 'Sassy Gay Friend' Series Puts Second City Back In The Gay Zone
Apr 20 2010 Filed in: The Funnies | YouTube
Here’s a trio of clips entitled “Sassy Gay Friend” that are LOL funny. Subscribe to the Second City feed on YouTube if you are so inclined, or friend them on Facebook. Enjoy.
"Housekeeping??" A Laugh For Your Job Search
Mar 09 2010 Filed in: The Funnies | Streaming Web
Usually A Throwaway, This Final SNL Skit Killed
Nov 14 2009 Filed in: The Funnies | Streaming Web
'Consternation' Is Actually 'Mitigated' By Spelling Out 'D-U-M-B C-O-N-T-E-S-T-A-N-T-S'
Sep 06 2009 Filed in: YouTube | The Funnies
Believing In Transparency And Digging The Nipples
May 11 2009 Filed in: YouTube | The Funnies
Talking about the president’s nipples is TMI, but Wanda is as funny as ever here. Part one, at the Correspondents’ Dinner, complete with the slamming on Joe Biden and Nancy Pelosi. “How’s it goin’, Joe?”
The highlight of this clip by far is giving it to Sarah Palin for pulling out of her GOP event: “That’s not the way to practice abstinence-only sex education.”
And then, part two, complete with the joyously biting and pharmaceutically accurate slam on Rush and on Hannity: “I Can break Sean Hannity by making him sit in a middle seat.”
The image of The Queen of England downloading Lady Gaga is reason enough to watch both of these all the way through!
The highlight of this clip by far is giving it to Sarah Palin for pulling out of her GOP event: “That’s not the way to practice abstinence-only sex education.”
And then, part two, complete with the joyously biting and pharmaceutically accurate slam on Rush and on Hannity: “I Can break Sean Hannity by making him sit in a middle seat.”
The image of The Queen of England downloading Lady Gaga is reason enough to watch both of these all the way through!
SONY Ain't The Only Company Guilty Of Peddling Shit
Apr 03 2009 Filed in: The Funnies | The Onion
Let's Have An Election Do-over For April Fool's... Sort Of
Apr 01 2009 Filed in: The Funnies
I Think Stewie Has Left A Few Other People Off The List
Mar 21 2009 Filed in: The Funnies | YouTube
Weatherman Says... It's Gonna Get Hot (& Buggy) Tonight
Feb 27 2009 Filed in: The Funnies | YouTube
I’m making a reference to the old Jack Wagner song of the 80s here, but more to the point...
Rule No. 356-b of newscasting: don’t hire a gay weatherman in a dirty newsroom. It’s just a disaster waiting to happen.
Rule No. 356-b of newscasting: don’t hire a gay weatherman in a dirty newsroom. It’s just a disaster waiting to happen.
Don't Worry, Be Happy... The Rotary Phone Is Gone
Feb 25 2009 Filed in: The Funnies | YouTube
Rarely do we find a comedian who so perfectly captures the stupidity of people and the best way to mock them...
No Need For A Set Up: Five Percent Of Europe Should Be Slapped
And not in a good way:
SNL Becomes More Brilliant And Astute By The Week
Oct 05 2008 Filed in: The Funnies | Streaming Web
Shout out to Jason Sudeikis and Queen Latifah for nailing it along with Tina Fey once again.
I'm Thinking... Next Time? Don't Mess With Letterman
First, John McCain ditches Letterman in favor of an interview with Katie Couric, apparently not being truthful about his reasons for the no-show:
Then, Letterman came back on Day Two with even more zingers - including a snarky comment about inauguration day and Paris Hilton:
Last night, Julia Louis-Dreyfus came on and showed some solidarity:
I wonder what Dave's got on tap tonight.
Then, Letterman came back on Day Two with even more zingers - including a snarky comment about inauguration day and Paris Hilton:
Last night, Julia Louis-Dreyfus came on and showed some solidarity:
I wonder what Dave's got on tap tonight.
Of Bras, Panties And Hair Styling: Cloris Leachman On Bonnie Hunt
Take a break from the grind and look at this clip from The Bonnie Hunt Show.
She and Cloris Leachman have great chemistry and you'll laugh your ass off.
Frankly I was surprised at how at ease Bonnie Hunt is with her new show.
Enjoy...
She and Cloris Leachman have great chemistry and you'll laugh your ass off.
Frankly I was surprised at how at ease Bonnie Hunt is with her new show.
Enjoy...
Hey Jude Has Never Sounded Better
Sep 12 2008 Filed in: The Funnies | YouTube
I needed some comic relief amidst Sarah "Caribou Barbie" Palin and the rest of the crap we've been subjected to.
So, I submit the following for humor consideration:
So, I submit the following for humor consideration:
Is This Man Ready To Be President?
Sep 08 2008 Filed in: The Funnies | Seriously?
With love and gratitude to Reeno for sending this creepiest of images along.If I may say, the protest vote is starting to look more and more like a "Great Grandpaw Godzilla for President" campaign postcard!
Shop somewhere else -- we're fresh out of crazy.
I'm thinking... Presidency? No. Ritalin? Definitely.
Could be a doctored photo? But his temper (dis-temper) has been widely speculated to be as rabid as it is depicted here.
I'll Deliver The Muffin Basket To Sarah Palin Myself
Kathy Griffin was in rare form at the Fab Fox this weekend.
Below is one of a bunch of clips from her late-show gig, including a riff on how Sarah Palin has been a boon to comics across the country:
Below is one of a bunch of clips from her late-show gig, including a riff on how Sarah Palin has been a boon to comics across the country:
This Hurts To Watch... Because You'll Laugh And Wince At Once
Aug 19 2008 Filed in: YouTube | The Funnies
First, a gag Olympic snippet by Paul Hunt courtesy of Aunt Denny:
And then I found an even earlier one, here:
Which then sent me down an Olympic blooper K-hole, and I found the following. Warning... this is painful to watch, both due to wheezing laughter and "ouch!" moments on the balance beam, vault, et. al.
Can I just say that I'm glad men don't compete on the balance beam? I mean, could you imagine the ruptures? Holy crap!
And then I found an even earlier one, here:
Which then sent me down an Olympic blooper K-hole, and I found the following. Warning... this is painful to watch, both due to wheezing laughter and "ouch!" moments on the balance beam, vault, et. al.
Can I just say that I'm glad men don't compete on the balance beam? I mean, could you imagine the ruptures? Holy crap!
We Officially Have A Sequel To 'Chill Bitch, I Don't Kno Yo' Life'
Aug 13 2008 Filed in: YouTube | The Funnies
This Is Just So Funny That I Had To Re-run It
Aug 12 2008 Filed in: The Funnies | JibJab
Stolen Effexor Slogan Effectively Ends Ineffectual Affect Of The GOP
See more Adam "Ghost Panther" McKay videos at Funny or Die
Screw Grandpa Munster... Give Paris Equal Time
See more funny videos at Funny or Die
McCain Should Have Considered An Ashley Simpson Exit
The befuddled among us... could there be a more tragic answer to a simple, seemingly non-toxic question?
Look up "Deer in Headlights" in the dictionary... there he'll be.
Look up "Deer in Headlights" in the dictionary... there he'll be.
What Superhero Are You?
Jun 09 2008 Filed in: General Posts | The Funnies
The Green Lantern is pretty cool, I gotta say.
You are Green Lantern
Click here to take the "Which Superhero am I?" quiz...
You are Green Lantern
| Hot-headed. You have strong will power and a good imagination.  |
Click here to take the "Which Superhero am I?" quiz...
Kids Say The Damndest Things... With Better Memories
Jun 04 2008 Filed in: YouTube | The Funnies
NBC has disabled YouTube's embedding function for many of these great, classic Friends bloopers -- but I found one that will make you chuckle...
Watch how Jennifer Anniston and David Schwimmer gain some greater understanding about their lines.
Watch how Jennifer Anniston and David Schwimmer gain some greater understanding about their lines.
Another Star Wars Spoof, With Jennifer Saunders At The Helm
May 30 2008 Filed in: YouTube | The Funnies
An Invitation To The Tea Partay, Penned In Cursive
May 19 2008 Filed in: YouTube | The Funnies